I’m a Little Obsessed With This Giant Balloon Dog Bench

I write WL‘s shopping column, so my inbox is always full of emails about the newest, coolest furniture and homewares. From the tempting-to-buy-myself (these gorgeous woven baskets) to the aspirational (this credenza handcrafted from Western Canadian marble), I often get the first look at what furniture stores will have on offer in the coming months.

That said, no one item has caught my eye quite like this one. While scrolling through yet another beautiful furniture gallery (my job is so hard) I saw what looked like your classic balloon animal€”a dachshund-esque figure. As a lover of dogs and all things bizarre, I immediately emailed the source (something professional along the lines of What the heck is this?).

As I waited for a response, I studied the image some more€”there was nothing in the photo that showed scale, so it might have been some kind of small paperweight, or a piece of hallway art. I had a feeling, though, that it might be something far grander.

And I was right.

The Attackle bench (available at Vancouver’s OMG it’s small and online) is about six and a half feet long. It’s the larger-than-life seating solution of your wiener dog dreams. The name of the bench is actually a play on the Dutch word for dachshund: teckel. Granted, the design might not be for everyone€”for example, people who are boring and into boring things€”but for dog (or clown)-loving maximalists, it’s perfect.

Oh, you don’t have the space for a human-sized balloon dog bench? Not to worry€”it’s made of plastic, so it’s suitable for outdoors too. I was also, frankly, shocked at the price. Much of the furniture I peruse for work costs more than my car (hey, I said it was aspirational), but Attackle is $800. Not bad.

So one day in the future, when we can entertain again, don’t be surprised if the centerpiece of my dinner party is a giant balloon dog. Perhaps I’ll change my entire design aesthetic to suit this one extraordinary seat. It’s cute, and fun, and€”I daresay€”a little twisted.